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Archive for July, 2008

Jul 28 2008

Beckham to Blazers?

Published by runyon under Uncategorized Edit This

I was doing my normal morning run-through of the sports sites and the pop culture sites and this rumor comes up - the Blazers are in talks to get a great athlete that is extremely well-known.  I’ve seen this subtext, this code before.

The Blazers are in talks with the Los Angeles Galaxy to trade for David Beckham.

It’s an obvious trade for both teams.  Beckham is getting older but he’s still an athlete at the peak of his game, and could add a veteran presence to the youngest team in the NBA.  He’s fast and has leadership that just can’t be quantified, leading his teams to multiple Premiership and UEFA titles.  Also, he will bring much-needed publicity to Portland.  What’s better to get the team on national and international television than having the most famous athlete in the entire world playing PG for the team?  We can’t forget his international popularity, also.  He will be a great link to Europe and our European players.  What better for a young gun like Rudy or Sergio than having the player they grew up idolizing on Real Madrid come in and help them?  What an ambassador!

I assume that Paul Allen is buying the MLS in the trade for him, along with unloading Darius Miles’ contract on Los Angeles, which finally returns him to his head-bump roots.

The future keeps on getting brighter and brighter for the Blazers.

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Jul 24 2008

What Could Go Wrong

Published by runyon under Uncategorized Edit This

The Blazers are the most hopeful young-talent-loaded team in the NBA.  That’s impossible to deny.  They stole the NBA summer league MVP, and he won’t even be one of the two best rookies on the team.  The general wisdom is that the Blazers will be perennial contenders with that time period starting as early as this year and without a doubt in the next three.  However, all this optimism really needs some tempering.  What could go wrong?

The Blazers are a young team.  What the entire team operates in is that unknown quantity - words like potential and upside.  There are no tangible figures about what the team will be.  Sure Travis Outlaw could be a 20-plus scorer with his jumping ability, but the operating form is the conditional “could.”  He could also never get his head on straight and become the player he has the potential to be and continue firing those foot on the line Outlaw specials.

There are the injury concerns, as well.  Oden is the obvious choice for this, so I won’t really go into it.  The greatest example of potential becoming reality for him that we’ve seen so far is the fact that his leg issues turned out to be gravely serious.  He’s not alone.  There is the man behind him that many call the best back-up center in the NBA: Joel Przybilla.  He hasn’t played a full season since God knows when.  A thin, injury prone front line would kill any chances this team has for a playoff run.  Do you really expect Channing to play the role of bruiser in the playoffs if Greg and Joel go down?

There is also the condition of the overseas transition.  Everyone knows the success stories; the guys like Tony Parker, Dirk Nowitzki, and Manu Ginobili.  Even our own people like Sabas and Petrovic.  Those guys aren’t the rule, though.  The rule is just as much the failures or the fizzle-outs; Darko, Sergio, Monia, and Veektor.   Yes, I intentionally included three Blazers.  We know better than anyone the highs and lows of potential foreign players.  Until we see anything on an NBA court, Rudy, Batum, and Koponen are just potential, and nothing more.

Finally, there’s just the issue of other teams being good.  The Blazers aren’t working in a vacuum. All the other teams are trying just as hard to win the championship as the Blazers are (except the Bucks).  There are plenty of teams peaking or looking to peak at the same time as us.  The Jazz will be great for the next decade, as will be the Lakers.  We are not alone.

Don’t take this as negativity - it’s not.  Just take it as pragmatism.  Not every move Kevin Pritchard makes will be perfect.  It’s impossible (I hope it isn’t, though).  With standards that high, you’re destined for disappointment.  Then again, with lowered standards, the highs will be a little higher, too.   Things are looking up, but let’s not go crazy, okay?

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Jul 19 2008

A Case For Squatch

Published by runyon under Uncategorized Edit This

This beast has been stalking the woods of the Pacific Northwest for 15 years, loved by all for his feats of flipping, dunking, and, of all things, roller-blading.

Squatch ascended the ranks of mascotry quickly, becoming one of the best in the NBA, if not in all professional sports.  Now he’s unemployed.  How can it be that Stuff the Magic Dragon in Orlando has a job, but a legendary Northwest mythical creature will not because some idiot in Oklahoma City says so?  Which leads me to the question: Is Portland a good fit for Squatch?

Proximity: Portland is the closest franchise to the former Seattle Supersonics, and makes them a fitting target.  Obviously, there have been sightings of Sasquatch from southern Oregon all the way up to BC, so, in terms of a geographical fit, Squatch fits the Blazers as well as any team in the league.

Familiarity:  The shaggy hair of Squatch is quite familiar to Blazer fans - especially the ones who remember Bill Walton’s armpits in the 1970s.


Blaze: A major argument against him could be the presence of our current mascot, Blaze.  If we have one already, why would we want two?  The real question: why wouldn’t we?  Let’s consider what we gain from having two mascots: double the t-shirts, double the fans with away jerseys being covered with silly string in the stands, double dunks, double pizza deliveries, double fun!

Squatch himself: Moreover, what would you prefer?  Would you prefer this great idea go to waste, waiting until Seattle gets another franchise in some unknown time period?  Or would you prefer a mascot, which is just a person in a suit, much like any one of you in the working world, get to keep their job and keep doing what they want to do?  Why is it that guys like Raef LaFrentz and Darius Miles are still getting money from the Blazers but Squatch isn’t?

There’s injustice here, and it must be remedied.

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Jul 16 2008

Ugh! (Post-game reactions from Blazers vs. Kings)

Published by runyon under Uncategorized Edit This

That game was like watching a friend’s cousin’s high school graduation.  Completely uneventful, overlong, and too many whistles.

What is there to say about this shitheap of a game?  Neither team looked particularly good, but it seemed like the Kings were in control the entire game, even when the Blazers took leads on 12-0 runs.  It looked like they assembled a team made to win the summer league, with all of their starters having some NBA experience.  For the deer-and-headlight Blazers, it would have been a miracle to overcome that.  That, and the Kings also had a center, something that Josh whatever just can’t handle.

Which takes us to the individual player reviews.  I’ll preface the PG section by saying that without a center (or any other big man, for that matter) the PGs’ numbers will be changed substantially.  PK Flash and Rex are the best players on the team, and they’re expected to pick up the scoring load because, really, no one else will.  They’re trying to win more than show that they can throw a few good passes (which they can).  Bayless, like before looked great, just as he did the game before, and is a frontrunner in Summer League MVP talk.  He can slash through defenses with ease, and is fearless going up with his shot in the lane, somethng that can really separate a good guard from the pack.

PK Flash (formerly known as Petteri Koponen) put on a decent show tonight, doing the same good things as before.  It’s pretty easy to look good though, when you’re the only player that can hit an outside shot.  Koponen revealed a nasty habit last night that I suspect might be a permanent problem.  He telegraphs super lazy passes.  It’s a given that the guys in this league are quicker than the ones in Finland, and I doubt that Koponen’s used to that kind of speed and effort being used to jump his passes .  Highlight for Koponen tonight, probably when they played “Mortal Kombat” and I imagined the voice saying “Finnish him.”

Nicolas Batum is just a horrible ugly project.  He’s supposed to be a first round pick and he just is clueless out there, with no idea what exactly he’s supposed to be doing.  If he’s on the Blazers this year, I’m afraid he’ll struggle to be a starter on the Idaho Stampede.  About letting the guy go back to Europe for the next four years, I’m somewhat in favor of it.  I don’t see him contributing in any substantial way for four years, so why not let him simmer a bit?

Most of all, I’m just happy that endless, horrible exhibition was mercifully ended.

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Jul 15 2008

Post-game/Pre-game

Published by runyon under Uncategorized Edit This

To be honest, last night’s game was the first Summer League I have ever watched, and I was impressed by the only 3 players I was paying attention to.  Jerryd Bayless definitely knows what he’s doing out there.  All those rumors about him being the better version of Jarrett Jack have been strengthened through our first glimpse of his play.  He seems like a gamer, as he took advantage of the Summer League’s guard-oriented play in blowing up for over 25 points.  The thing he did that I can see being useful to the Blazers is attacking the jumped double team.  So many possessions stalled at the top of the key last year, as Jack, Brandon, or Blake got trapped at the top of the key, afraid to make the foul or create a foul.  Bayless seems like a guy who isn’t afraid of contact, and takes advantage of it as a dead-eye free throw shooter.

Koponen just seemed like a better version of Sergio.  His vision was strong, he disrupted the passing lanes, and he could actually knock down a jumper if called upon to do so.  These opinions can change quickly; it is Summer League after all.

Batum looked lost on offense.  He couldn’t decide if he wanted to be the scorer or the hustle guy as he just drifted around the key.  On defense he looked really good, catching up to his man and really making them work.  Too bad he got injured.

Overall, it was a fun game, and even better because a win always feels good.

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Jul 14 2008

Summer League Pre-Game: Blazers vs. Wizards

Published by runyon under Uncategorized Edit This

There’s not that much to say about this game; it’s unknown quantity versus less-than-unknown quantity.  Over half of these guys won’t be in training camp, and the ones with the giant hops will decide what happens.  On our side, we can watch guys like Bayless and see what all the hype is about, and also the Honka Playboy, Petteri Koponen, a man from a country whose president looks like a female version of Conan O’Brien.  I also want to see what Nicolas Batum does, being Bastille Day and all.  I’m not sure what the holiday’s relevance is to basketball, but whatever.  Holidays are massive deals like when Christmas happens during the basketball season, Independence Day during baseball, and Thanksgiving during football.  Why wouldn’t the Batman get fired up for Bastille Day?

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Jul 13 2008

Are You There GOd, It’s Me, DDR Pad.

Published by runyon under Uncategorized Edit This

Hey Greg,

It’s me, you know, the DDR Pad. Where have you been? I’ve been rolled up in a closet in the basement for almost a year. I remember we used to have so much fun before, you’d jump around on top of me, and I’d give you points on your plasma screen. It was great. Since I’m made out of plastic and fabric, your jumping would never break me, and I always stayed in place. We were a team, Greg. A team!

What now, though? I’m living in a basement in Tualatin, Oregon, like some sort of suburban hermit. The only company I get are curious ants or that dog repeatedly declaring, that yes, I am his territory.

And I know you haven’t stopped playing games either, that’s the worst part. I hear you up there; with Master Chief last fall, with Call of Duty, with Guitar Hero and your unexpected love of ZZ Top and Foghat, with 2K8, yelling at the screen as digitized you swatted away another shot into the seventh row. Why won’t you play with me?

What did I ever do to you, man? I thought we were friends. We can still be friends! Just take me out, we can reminisce on the good old times, maybe even make a new ones. What’s the worst that can happen?

Yours,

DDR Pad

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Jul 05 2008

The Sonic Situation

In the most egregious abuse of ownership power in the last ten years, Clay Bennett has finally gotten permission from the NBA to move the nearly 40-year-old Sonic franchise to Oklahoma City. We obviously all have heard the whole news story, but let’s move on to reconciliation.

Seattle will feel what us fans in Portland have been feeling pretty much our entire lives. It’s a condition of not having a sports team I call sansequipitis. Much like Seasonal Affective Disorder, it makes little to no sense, but causes extreme bouts of depression and obsessive watching of Fox Sports NW. We fans from Portland grew up with these feelings, rooting by proxy for teams like the Seahawks or the Niners, the Mariners or the Giants, due to our city’s lack of team or lack of trying for a team. (The Portland Rockies? Come on.) We know your feeling, Seattle, and we’re more than willing to welcome you into our family, as you have welcomed us into watching the Seahawks and the Mariners.

We have a long-standing tradition of all-inclusiveness as Blazer fans. We pretty much welcome anyone who’s heard of the team (which makes up about 10% of NBA fans). Now is the time to join too, as no one will accuse you of jumping on the bandwagon. Oden hasn’t played a game (aside from occasional runs at 24 Hour Fitness in Tualatin), Rudy hasn’t played a game (aside from being, you know, the best player in Europe). You get to follow the rise of a team under Nate McMillan from sub-.500 to playoff glory (kind of like in 04-05).

These are only a couple of reasons to join us, and there will be more to come. You’ve welcomed us for so long, Seattle. We’re more than happy to return the favor for you.

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Jul 03 2008

Live From New York

Published by runyon under Uncategorized Edit This

The NBA store is a concrete-made-to-look-like-marble mammoth on Fifth Avenue in New York, across the street from a Salvatore Ferragamo flagship and down a block from the main locations of The Gap and Zara. It fits in nicely, as everything is a hue of gray due to the area receiving sunlight for about one hour a day because of the monstrous buildings. You’re welcomed in with an HR Giger-esque revolving door that has the disembodied arms of Michael Jordan in place of bars on the door for pushing.

Inside, you immediately see what you expect: Knicks merchandise and Boston merchandise (They’re the champs after all). As you go around the top/first floor, you get the range of normal touristy stuff: Adidas apparel, T-shirts that just say “NBA Store” for $35, (Nice, David Stern) and for a comedic break a small WNBA section. I have no right to expect the Blazers up here, because, after all, we weren’t even in the playoffs this year, although we had an all-star.

Downstairs is where I expected our players represented to a degree that was at least proportionate to the rest of the league. After all, the Blazers were #7in attendance last year. What do I find? An Oden jersey displayed proudly as soon as I got down there. Joy flooded my body, a home three thousand miles away from home, they have our guy. Then I look at the jerseys surrounding him. Zach Randolph. Ugh. Then I wonder, where’s Brandon Roy. Oh, he’s tucked in the back, behind a ladder. I guess he was only an All-Star and there’s valuable space needed for those Eddy Curry jerseys.

Still, the most disgusting part of this excursion came when I was looking through the t-shirt section. Here, there are a bunch of shirts with the retro logo of NBA teams. You know the type: Washington Bullets, cursive Chicago, the skyline of Seattle for the Supersonics. I was excited here. I finally had a souvenir from the NBA store - a retro Portland logo t-shirt, our proud pinwheel turned vertical. I looked all around. It wasn’t there.

“Where are the Blazers shirts?” I asked a nearby employee folding Nets shirts.

“Uh, we have the Bullets shirts over there.”

“Yes, I know, but where are the Trailblazers?”

“I told you, the Bullets are over there.”

“Yeah, I know, but the Bullets are the Wizards now. I mean, the Blazers, you know, from Portland?”

“Oh!”

“So do you have them?”

“No.”

Thus ended my search for an interesting Blazers shirt. At least it should have, but I still pressed on! I rifled through the area and found something of immaculate wonder: a back of a shirt with the number 22 and the word “DREXLER” spelled above it. Here it was I found it. I quickly unfolded it, to hold up against myself in that neutered form of trying on clothing. As the front revealed itself, a lump of sausage pizza rose from my stomach. It read “Houston Rockets.” According to the NBA, Clyde Drexler isn’t a Blazer.

I take away one lesson from my experience at the NBA store. We have every right to gloat and Pritch-slap whoever we damn please. The NBA gives us no respect, so we should be just as disrespectful to them. They don’t care what happens in Portland. One of the league’s biggest success stories, and they’re thrown behind a ladder. We must continue with our pride. The French have a phrase for this (ask Batum) “Je m’en fous.” It translates roughly to “I don’t give a damn” (although slightly worse). This should be our motto. This makes me think more that Blazers really our team and not meant for anyone else. If people find them, excellent, the more the merrier, but the NBA sure isn’t going out of its way to let customers or employees know we exist.

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