Trail Post - A Portland Trail Blazers Blog

Seriously, his knees might explode.

This piling on Greg thing is really just a horrible idea for all involved. The dude is only 21 years old, but we’ve all recently found out, he’s as moody as a sophomore girl over at Westview High School whose boyfriend just broke up with her. He can’t take this sort of criticism, and it only serves to make everyone worse. Criticizing someone who just turned 21 for having a drink may be as absurd of a situation that I’ve heard of. Not to mention the questioning of his will to play. He worked out for a year straight to get back to playing condition, and a couple of freak events cause the local media to declare, “He’s not ready,” “He doesn’t love the game,” “He smokes pot before games.”

Yes, that rumor has made its return after a more than 4 year absence. Blaming marijuana for the poor play or “lack of effort” from players. I’m beginning to think that this allegation is a mathematical, easily predictable occurrence. First of all, we have to start with the expectations. When the Blazers are horrible, or the team is full of young guys who are always “two years away from respectability” no one piles on with negative news. Everyone’s happy that they can tie their shoes. There’s also the economic component. When the economy is really cooking, moral righteousness goes down, but when there’s a collapse, such as during the dot-com bust or the current one, people are a bit more chippy about the personal habits of these multi-millionaires. Then there’s the national interest. When national interest starts peaking, the sordid stories start coming out of the woodwork. The time the Timberwolves player crashed his car because he was masturbating in his SUV to porn on the in-dash DVD player wasn’t as major as it could have been, because, honestly, who cares about the T-Wolves? Finally, there’s John Canzano, the Northwest’s shorthand for lazy reporting.

Canzano is by no means the only person in the Portland media guilty of this; he just happens to be most prolific. Canzano traffics in hearsay and reports it as fact. He was the vanguard of the Oregonian’s anti-Blazer crusade during the fall of the Jail Blazers, and he’s had to quiet down as it just didn’t seem prudent to pile on a bunch of 19-year-olds struggling to win 25 games. Now this team is expected to win something like infinity games, and the reason for every loss has to be the herb.

Whatever. All this talk of not having the love of the game or loving to party too much is just the sign of a lazy writer in a tough part of the season. I should know; I just spent all these words talking about it.

The +/- stat is a funny thing. It’s roundly derided and it really serves no purpose other than to make people who feel one way feel better about their position due to the added tidbit of evidence. It’s the Keith Olbermann of stats.

“Did you know that George W. Bush wanted to feed puppies to Katrina victims?” No I didn’t, Keith! Thank goodness I didn’t vote for that guy!

The hate-love relationship we have with Travis Outlaw has been well-chronicled, but there needs to be yet another chapter added. Why the hell are we playing Travis Outlaw for more than 22 minutes per night? The man is completely useless outside of the fourth quarter. During the first quarter last night, when Travis came in, the Blazers were up 5. When he came out, they were down 10. Later, when he came in during the third after Nicolas Batum brought the team back into the game, the lead was run back up to 13 after being cut to 5.

The thesis for the night was “Travis Outlaw is not a worthwhile basketball player.” +/- gave me the answer I wanted. If it didn’t, it could have easily been disregarded as a bad stat.

Here’s the issue with Travis Outlaw. He has an incredible nose for the big moment, and enters an insane zone which makes him nearly unstoppable at the end of games. The problem is, he has zero focus for the rest of the game. He creates what I like to call “The Outlaw Paradox.” It’s when he comes into the game when the Blazers are up or clicking well, and his lack of defense causes the team to fall into a deep hole. Because the team is in a hole, Nate leaves him in the game because the conventional wisdom says we need his offense, and not Batum’s defense, to shoot us back into the game. The hole deepens until the fourth quarter, when Travis wakes up and realizes there’s a game going.

Back to the +/- though. You can guess how they’re going to look based on the subject matter of the post. The Blazers lost by 4. Nicolas Batum had a rating of +22 during the game in 27 minutes. Travis Outlaw, however, had a rating of -17 in 27 minutes. Yes, that’s a 40-point swing between the two players last night. The Outlaw Paradox was hard at work.

Here’s a brief note about tonight’s game:

1. The Rockets are the Worst Case Scenario for the Blazers. Not in terms of matchups or anything like that; but mostly because they are the WCS for how the team could turn out. They have a superstar center and SG that can take over games if they want to, but instead they just get injured a lot. Sound like a local team. They’re a great veteran team that can beat anyone in the league, but they’re basically screwed. The only way they’ll win a championship is on 2K9.

2. We probably won’t be watching the entirety of the game, yet again. When it comes to choosing between watching the Vaseline-smeared broadcast on Comcast Sports Net or getting loaded and yelling obscenities at Twilight at a pub theater in Beaverton, Trail Post has to take the latter every time.

3. Ron Artest rules. He’s just the greatest badass in history. He’s most famous for being in the brawl at the Palace of Auburn Hills, but this isn’t the only time that Artest has intervened in history. He’s somewhat of a Doctor Who of ass-kicking.

It’s time to feel sorry for Brandon Roy.  It’s difficult to score on a guy who led an army of elephants across the Alps.

Sorry about not updating this weekend to the two people who actually look at this on the weekends. But hey, we actually did get to speak with the newest Blazer, Michael Ruffin.

TP: Hey Michael, did you have a great weekend?

TP: Did you enjoy Sunday’s game more than the one on Friday?

Um, yes.

TP: We didn’t get to see it, but we heard some crazy stuff went down. Could Steve Blake’s first quarter performance have been one of the most unexpected events you’ve ever seen?

No.

I’ve seen things.

What a nice guy that Ruffin is.

We had it. Teams were begging the Blazers to take away their useful players in exchange for scraps like Travis Outlaw and Raef LaFrentz. But Pritchard had to keep on pushing for those damned draft picks. Because, you know, the #15 pick in two years is more important than obviously turning the team into a title contender. This is the best possible opportunity the Blazers have had for improvement, but instead they decided to stand pat.

We don’t want you or your time-traveling Escalade.

This reminds me a bit of the good-to-great Mariners teams from 1995 to 2002. They had a great farm system and developed some of the best players of the last 25 years. However, when they were stuck in a playoff race and needed just one more bat or one more arm, they’d just stand still. They wouldn’t take the chance to make the move that would put them over the top. Then, of course, they’d falter in September, usually due to the flaw that should have been addressed at the deadline.

We had our chance, and we know our flaw. This team will not make it out of the first round of the playoffs as long as Travis Outlaw is getting more than 20 minutes per game.

These hard economic times are ideal for a team like the Blazers and an owner like Paul Allen. We have the money and we have the assets. We had a chance at three different small forwards that would instantly thrust us to title contender status, and instead, we stick with Travis Goddamn Outlaw. I know it’s easy to rag on Travis…I couldn’t come up with a “but” to that clause, it’s easy to rag on him. He’ll cost the team wins for the rest of the season, but now the blame isn’t on him. It’s on Kevin Pritchard, and Kevin Pritchard alone.

The man is a genius on draft day, and has created all the good parts of the franchise as we know it, but he’s hopeless at the deadline, and he may have just killed the team’s best chance to get better for a long time. This is a goddamn joke.

Now when we see Travis shoot a jumper with a foot on the line, it’s on KP. When Travis sags off the other team’s best shooter and the dude hits a 3, it’s on KP. When Travis watches a rebound hit the floor, it’s on KP. We had a chance to get rid of the team’s worst player, and he didn’t take it. I feel like I’m in an abusive relationship.

June 26th: Traded to the Blazers
February 18th: Traded to the Kings

Happy trails, Ike!

There is truly no preview needed. This will be the last game of an era and a weird one at that. The Blazers will field last year’s lineup with Joel Przybilla at he center, and it could be the last for a number of Blazers such as Travis Outlaw and Sergio Rodriguez.

It’s fitting that Darius Miles comes into town for this game. A relic from the Blazers’ past will be part of the farewell to another era of Blazers basketball. It’s also one of those great coincidences that the main reason the Blazers are so eager to trade right now is Miles and his ugly contract going back on the salary. I hope at some point Miles walks up to Travis and gives him a headband, saying, “Where you’re going, you’ll finally be able to wear one of these.”

And yeah, the Blazers should win, and OJ Mayo looks like he’s 40 years old.

We’re down to only 48 hours until the trade deadline.

As everyone (including Trail Post) has talked about, this thing has been narrowed to four teams. We got Gerald Wallace from Charlotte, Caron Butler from Washington, Richard Jefferson from Milwaukee, and some crazy Deng trade from Chicago. Basically, the Blazers will become a much better team no matter what happens, as long as they get Travis off of this team. As noted before, Travis is not only bad, but he drags down the Blazers whenever he plays at the SF position. While a decent backup PF, he still isn’t the right guy to take the Blazers out of the first round, and he certainly will not mature into anything special.

Along with that, there are the constant rumors about Salmons too.

We here at Trail Post will try to give you a different perspective though. You can look anywhere to find who we could get - we’ll show you what the Blazers are giving up. They are giving up one of the three worst SFs in the NBA who play more than 20 minutes per game. Just removing Travis from the roster will help the team. Those who say that trading Travis will kill the team’s chemistry are, for lack of a better word, stupid. They’re stupid. These guys aren’t kids at summer camp. He and Brandon aren’t wearing woven friendship bracelets. As friend of the blog Wilson said, “The team isn’t going to be hurt by not having Travis let the other guys win at NBA 2K9.”

For all of you Travis fans out there, enjoy that last ill-advised pull-up, that last foot on the line jumper, and of course that last time he hangs around between the key and the three-point contest while his man dunks a put-back. Trail Post will miss your last second shots, but will not miss your play during the other 47 minutes of the game.

Another year, another impressive All-Star Game.

The dude is just unreal with his poise. When surrounded by the best players in the game, he just elevates his. Years ago, back when Rasheed would make the All-Star game, it was a rare treat to see a Blazer actually play, as Sheed would get maybe 15 minutes at the very most in the game, and look lost because no one would be playing defense or passing him the ball on the low block. It was the kind of sadness that ingrains the Portland inferiority complex (Such as thinking Rudy was shafted in the dunk contest) in Blazer fans early.

Brandon just puts all those thoughts away when he takes the court in an ASG. He looks as smooth and unhurried as he ever does, but it just happens that his PG is Chris Paul, and he’s playing SF in order to have Kobe at the 2. No big deal. Here he is, one of the most dominant ball-handlers in the league, just waiting on the wing, resting, until he gets the ball and works his magic, and then takes another nap. Brandon missed 1 shot last night en route to a Roy-esque 15, 5, and 5, which brings up his career FG% in the ASG to an astronomical 83%. Out of any guard who has played in two or more All Star games, Brandon has to be the best in NBA history.

It’s a fun time to be a Blazer fan.

1. Be Dwight Howard.

2. If being Dwight Howard isn’t possible, be Nate Robinson.

3. If neither is possible, kiss your ass goodbye. You’re done before you even started.

Rudy got screwed last night, and screwed badly. Dwight Howard had a total of one Dwight Howard-worth dunk last night (the bounce off the side) and the rest was artificially-inflated garbage. Dude, it’s pretty easy to dunk on a 12 foot rim if you’re reasonably athletic and 7 feet tall. He only needs a vertical leap of 24 inches. Yawn. If Nate Robinson did it, I’d be impressed.

And the Superman schtick is just lame. It was lame when it happened last year, and it was even worse this year. It hit its all time low when Nate whipped out the kryptonite uniform. Why doesn’t the NBA just save the entire Denver and Portland fan base some trouble and just not have Rudy or JR Smith in the competition? We waited all day Saturday, through yet another intensely forgettable Shooting Stars Challenge (everyone’s favorite event to watch 50 year old ball players struggle to hit half-court shots), the event where point guards take fifteen damn attempts to put a basketball through a hanging tire that is imprinted with PlayStation ads, and then the worst three-point contest ever. I’ve never seen a winning score be less than 20. Then when we finally see our players, they get hosed. Nate Robinson jumping off a dude for a dunk got the same as Rudy throwing a behind the back pass off the backboard for a dunk. The same as Rudy taking an alley-oop off the back of the backboard for a dunk. It’s not the fact that it’s rigged that I don’t like. It’s the fact that they did a piss-poor job of it.

Congrats, NBA. You put together the worst All-Star Saturday ever, and you shat on two of the league’s best franchises.

(However, if this was a clever way to have LeBron come out of hiding and join the festivities; MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.)

We’re here again, it’s nearly Valentine’s Day, and it can be a tough time for any basketball fan in a relationship. You have to balance going out along with watching All-Star Saturday. Sure, if you live in Phoenix, you can do both simultaneously, and probably have a great time, but for us up in Portland, Trail Post has a solution. For those of you that want to give your loved ones a gift they appreciate, but still stay true to your Blazers, we present Blazer Valentines.

Joel Przybilla teaches us about spelling, and about love.

Rudy and Sergio invite you to a party.

Nicolas Batum teaches you a little bit of French.

Oden lets us know how he feels.

Paul Allen is a hopeless romantic.

You can’t spell kable without “Blake.”

Nate’s all-inclusive.

Greg saves his rejections for the court!

Brandon is always a romantic slam dunk.

He loves to love, even when he’s on the mend.

LaMarcus’ love is a condition.

The only thing that Channing loves more than puppies? You.

Jerryd keeps his priorities in order.

Larry Miller has trouble expressing his feelings.

Shavlik Randolph does not.

No caption needed.

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!

Pictures by Wilson Peery and Robert Runyon

You suck.

Love,
Trail Post

Last night, the Blazers redeemed themselves against the Nonics, by beating them by a large sum of points.

What is there to say? Brandon Roy was good but not great, as he started off shooting a ton of jumpers, but still managed to pick up his normal numbers. LaMarcus was hampered by foul trouble for most of the game, but he recorded a double double. Greg came to play, and dominated on both ends of the court, along with outperforming Kevin Durant. So that’s the big three, right?

Other people who contributed included Joel with an absurd amount of rebounds, Travis with his patented “be crappy all game and then plunge the dagger in the fourth quarter” pattern, and Jerryd, who decided to look like a real PG for the first time in his career.

At the game, there was a surprising lack of green and yellow in support of the Sonics. It seemed like some were confused as to what they were going to do. They couldn’t root for the Nonics, because that would be rooting for Clay Bennett, and they weren’t ready to switch their alliance to Portland. So basically there were a few half-hearted Super-Sonics chants. The signs were great, but none of them ever went up on the big screen.

During halftime, while speaking with some Sonics fans, Trail Post learned that Seattle kept the rights to the Sonics name and history, but it lost one more thing in addition to the team - its championship. Their NBA title was taken down to OKC by Bennett. I swear, every new story I hear about him just creates a more evil caricature. He not only takes a team, but the title too. He does this during schedule gaps where he isn’t kicking cute puppies. I’m sure he’s a vampire that drinks baby blood too.

Clay kicked me.

Anyway, the Blazers won and chalupas were had by all. There’s only one more game left before the break, and it’s against the Warriors tonight. The Warriors are horrible, and the Blazers should be able to knock them out before it’s a game. Hopefully Greg Oden does his “I’m a dominant center” impression again.

We here at Trail Post love to play video games. The personal fave around Trail Post central is Rock Band 2, both due to our undying love of rhythm and annoying our neighbors. Nothing can beat belting out Squeeze’s “Tempted” at 2 in the morning, with the happy knowledge that no one on the block will be able to sleep due to you.

Anyway, earlier today, an brown envelope with no return address was found on our doorstep. Inside was a copy of a game that we have never heard of. Maybe it was in deep beta or something weird like that. Trail Post does not know much about software or how to program it.

Enticing, to be sure.

It was a copy of Clay Bennett’s Franchise Robber. Oddly enough, it was beautiful, mixing all sorts of genres and had some true emotional resonance towards the end. It opens as a strict sim, as you build Bennett’s empire and attempt to sow the seeds of discontent around the NBA in then-failing franchises such as the Bucks, Blazers, and Sonics. When you get a chance to buy a team, you have a clever Parappa the Rapper-styled mini-game where you lie about your intentions to stay in the city, all while secretly hiring the staff to work the machinations to move the team to Oklahoma City. After that, there’s a part with some true moral ambiguity. You can choose to run the team you’ve bought with competence, and turn them into a championship contender and have the whole city you’re in come to love you; or you can follow the dark path, and drive the team into the ground all while begging for money for a new facility. It’s truly up to you. While the selection of teams is low, the depth of the sim and the range of choices quickly made up for that. The court proceedings are in the Phoenix Wright style, and always fun to play. There’s definitely a direction the game wants to take you, but you have to appreciate that they leave your options ambiguous.

Like any other Xbox 360 game it had a series of Achievements to unlock for worthless Gamer Points to show how much of a nerd you are to friends over Xbox Live.

Still, I really felt that the last level where you blow away Starbucks-drinking zombies Halo-style a little gratuitous.

Dear Sonics Fan,

First off, we are so sorry about what happened to you. We’ve been on your side the entire time, and we hoped and prayed that your team stayed in Seattle. What’s so great about Oklahoma? I have my own personal disdain for the state due to a few football games between the Ducks and their two big schools, but beyond that, seriously, what do they have? Has there ever been a TV show that took place in Oklahoma City? No. It’s not like they could do Grey’s Anatomy or Frasier there. I’m sure they’d beat up Frasier because he pronounces “Chardonnay” without a hard “ch” and he isn’t convinced about the medicinal merits of chewing tobacco.

Your city is one of the most beautiful in the entire world, and your other teams provided some of my greatest sports memories. The Seahawks were the first team I had ever seen live, and also the first team in my adult life to ever make it to the championship game. I still play as them on Madden, even though I have to make my created player younger than myself as a rookie. The Mariners made me a sports fan. I don’t know if I watch sports if it wasn’t for 1995. But guess what, you still have those teams! The Mariners will be improved next year (mostly because they can’t get any lower) and the Seahawks may get a real wide receiver (apologies to Jordan Kent).

Which brings me to the point. We are all in this boat together, Seattle fan. I grew up watching your teams and loving them. Did I not like that Portland didn’t have baseball or football? Of course. That didn’t mean I booed Griffey when he came to bat. You know why? Because that would mean I’m a psycho. We want you to come down here and enjoy the Blazers so we can show you the hospitality you showed us for so many years, especially after being screwed by Clay Bennett and almost every other owner (except Mark Cuban and our very own Paul Allen). However, if you get the idea that it would be cute to boo Brandon Roy; you’re a psycho. Wear your yellow and green, we’ll be doing it too. Boo the Nonics, we’ll be doing it too. Pray for Squatch to show up, we’ll be doing it too. Just don’t be a bad guest. Portlanders want to be on your side, Seattle fan - give us a reason to do so.

Sincerely,
Trail Post

P.S. Trail Post is still extremely bitter about the Sounders going to the MLS and not the Timbers. You guys aren’t half the fans the Timbers Army is. I hope you lose every game and are moved down to Portland, where a major league team should be. Sympathy can only go so far.